How To Let Things Go: 7 Steps To Move On

Learning how to let things go is much easier said than done. In so many cases, we know we need to let go so we can move on to happier times, but the act of letting go is extremely difficult.

Whether you need to let go of a bad relationship, a toxic work situation, a lost dream, or an argument there are steps you can take that will help you let go in a way that doesn’t seem overwhelming.

The steps I’m sharing below are what I’ve worked through to help me let go of my own personal lost dream – having a biological baby of my own.

These tips are helpful no matter what your situation is and I hope you’ll find them practical and effective to help you move on.

Why Letting Go is So Important

When you’re holding on to something that isn’t working or you’re in a place in your life that disrupts your happiness, you are essentially halting good things from entering your life.

Letting go means you can:

• Focus on having a new beginning and moving forward
• Prioritize gratitude in your life
• Have healthier relationships and forgive those who matter
• Decrease stress and anxiety
• Concentrate on the positive things in life
• Sleep better at night
• Decrease ruminating thoughts and negative thoughts

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How to Let Things Go So You Can Move On – 7 Steps

How to let things go - 7 steps to help you finally move on. #lettinggo Click To Tweet

1. Feel Your Feelings

Understand that it’s okay to feel everything you need to feel. The first step in letting things go is giving yourself permission to truly feel. 

Be present with your uncomfortable or negative feelings. Notice when painful feelings arise.

This helps you understand painful experiences, validates them, and gives you a different perspective.

Don’t feel guilty or become angry with yourself for how you feel.

Accept your feelings and know that you are allowed to FEEL it all.

2. Think about Why it’s important for you to let go

Knowing why it’s important to let go of the past or let go of some of the hardest things you’ve experienced will help you with the process of letting go.

Here are some questions to consider:

• If you let go of this feeling, person or situation how will this make you feel?
• How will letting go improve your daily life right now? What great things will you have more mind space for?
• What will there be room for if you let go?
• How does letting go support your value system?

During this process also think about the harmful effects of holding on. 

4. Have a Backup Feel Better Plan

Once you begin to take action on letting go of a situation, feeling or person you need to have a backup feel better plan.

What is this?

A feel better plan is a list of activities you do when you feel yourself about to digress.

To create a feel better plan, start by writing a list of things you can do to feel better immediately…

• Walk the dog
• Play music
• Call your best friend
• Knock on your neighbour’s door
• Eat chocolate
• Deep breathing

This list will be unique to you and the point is when you feel yourself falling backward towards upset do something off your list.

5. Distance Yourself

Distance yourself from people, places or situations that make letting go hard to do.

For example:

• If you’re trying to let go of a relationship don’t go to the neighbourhood your ex lives in.
• Or, if you’re trying to move on from something like infertility, don’t attend your cousin’s baby shower. Distancing yourself from things that hurt is designed for you to look after yourself.

6. Focus on Acceptance

Depending on the situation, letting go can be extremely difficult, especially if you’re the type of person who likes (and needs) to be in control.

When you can’t control a situation the only choice you have is to eventually let go. This is important for your overall well-being and mental health.

How do you accept something?

I highly encourage you to focus a gratitude practice.

• Use a gratitude journal
• Write a gratitude list
• Write down 3 things you’re grateful for every single day
• Try this 30 day gratitude challenge

Focusing on gratitude will help you see all of the wonderful things you have in your life today, which in turn makes the process of accepting that you have to move on that much easier.

7. Learn How To Love Yourself

Loving yourself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. The more you do this the easier it will be to let go of things that are taking up your precious time, energy and mental space.

Once you honestly love and care for yourself, you’ll find that letting go is actually much easier. Why? Because holding on to something that isn’t going to change is unhealthy for you.

Related: Check out my Self Love Guided Journal you can pick up on Amazon, to help you focus on loving yourself more.

What About Letting Go of Sentimental Items?

This is a tough one. I do believe that if you have an item that is important to you, it holds a lot of sentimental value, it sparks joy, makes you think of happy memories, go ahead and keep it.

On the other hand, if you’re holding onto way too many things and you truly want to let things go, I highly encourage you to pick up Marie Kondo’s book, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up or check out this article from her on tips to clear out sentimental clutter.  

Learning How To Let Things Go: A Reminder

Going through these 7 steps to help you let things go will assist you when moving on from the struggle of holding on.

However, this is a little reminder that feelings may pop up from time to time – especially if you are trying to let go of something traumatic.

If you’ve practiced letting go and a feeling, a person or a situation reappears, here’s my best advice: 

• Acknowledge the feeling or situation
• Don’t beat yourself up if you aren’t acting or feeling in a way you wish
• Instead, go through the above process again

These 7 steps on learning how to let things go will help you with the little things that bother you and the larger, more challenging situations that are deeply affecting your life.

Whether you’re figuring out how to let things go in a relationship, at work, or in life I hope this will help you move on so you can focus on things that fill you up.

I’ll leave you with this quote from Steve Maraboli, which truly says it all…

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward. - Steve Maraboli #letgo #moveon Click To Tweet

How do you move on from a situation? How do you let things go when you’re having a hard time?

Share in the comments to inspire others.

More Resources To Help You Let Things Go & Move On:

• How to Live in the Present and Reduce Overwhelm
• Today I Choose Joy: Mood Tracker Journal
• 5 Types of Journaling for Mental Health
• 10 Reasons Life is Beautiful and Worth Living
• 10 Powerful Ways To Declutter Your Mind