51 Comments

  1. This was a great read! I’m at the age where a lot of my friends are getting engaged and I’m single…and I was the one everyone was positive would be married first! It’s been tough but so worth it to reframe my thoughts and view it positively.

    1. Hey Darby – thanks for the message. I know how you feel – I married much later than all my friends, but it was definitely worth the wait and I’m so happy I didn’t rush things when I was younger 🙂 There are so many benefits to being single, so cherish it and enjoy it! xo

  2. It’s like you’re reading my mind honestly. I hate how I look in a swimsuit and I have been putting off going swimming again because of it. Especially after putting weight on over lockdown. I agree with all your tips and especially not to compare yourself to others. My habit to do this has caused so many problems. Thanks for sharing, I’m sure you will help a lot of people 🙂

    1. Hi Ruth – thanks for the note! Us women can be so hard on ourselves. I think we can all give ourselves a break and think about how many good things we offer the world xo

  3. So good. We all face these struggles and it’s such a great trick to turn around our thinking to think positively about ourselves!

    1. Thanks Sarah! It can be a knack to get into the habit of doing, but it helps so much when you do it 🙂

  4. Jennifer Enoch says:

    Such great reminder and great truth here. Negative thoughts Naturally ppo up, but it’s so vital to keep your thoughts in check and balance them out with a dose of reality.

    1. Thanks so much Jen! You are right, it’s totally normal for negative thoughts to come up (for all of us). We just need to move on from them as much as possible 🙂

  5. This is such a great reminder!! Thank you so much for this. 🙂

  6. So much positivity. Famous TED talk by Shauna Shapiro on the power of mindfulness puts it at her conclusion “say to yourself everyday “i love you “, but if you find that sounds ridiculous, start with “good morning “. A lot of us are so anxious, fearful, guilty, shameful, so many negative emotions mainly because we are so harsh to ourselves, and we put the blame on others and circumstances. Learn to learn ourselves, then love others 🙂 Such a great post!
    I’ve just created a positivity blog myself recently, hoping to spread some love. Please check it out and if possible, give feedback and some collaborative posts, it’ll be much appreciated Yolanda!

    1. Hi Karthik – I love those words from Shauna! Congrats on starting a blog – I will definitely check it out. All the best to you 🙂

  7. These are so true points, all of them. I call myself queen of comparison (and not in a good way). I have tried to get a rid of this habit but it is surprisingly difficult.
    In this day and age especially when social media gives a whole new level to sugar coated lives…
    It feels like everyone’s life is perfect and sometimes it’s difficult to browse through Instagram because of that.

  8. Awesome reminders that we are all human! Anytime I find myself comparing to others I remind myself of the good qualities I have. It’s helpful if you develop a list of good qualities you have beforehand and you can just go back to whenever you find yourself comparing. My mom used to say “there’s a tough chapter in every life’s book”, and when I see “perfect” people or families I remind myself I don’t know what they’re going through or went through underneath that veneer of perfection.

    1. Your mom sounds like such a wise woman Sabrina! Such a true statement – people definitely only show how they want to portray themselves. I love that you have a go-to list of good qualities on hand. I’m going to give that a try too 🙂 xo

  9. Great advice! I always hate the way I look in things,in changing rooms, the lighting is so harsh! It’s so easy to amplify the negatives in our own minds and ignore the positives. Trying to think of some positives can help restore the balance 😊

  10. Thank you so much for this inspiration! I am often times overly critical of myself (the bathing suit piece spoke to me!) and need to put unnecessary negative thoughts out of my mind. Very much enjoyed this post. 🙂

  11. This is a very nice self-helping article! I’ve been reading a book about confidence as well 🙂

    1. Great to hear and happy you are focusing on yourself and your confidence too. It makes all the difference 🙂

  12. WOW…

    I totally needed to hear this!

    Thank you so much for sharing ..

    I agree the more aware we are of our negative thoughts the easier it is to nip it in the butt and address it.

    xxx have a great week

    1. Hi Paige – So glad to hear this was helpful! Absolutely – getting rid of negativity definitely starts with ourselves 🙂

  13. Totally agree with this!! I always get caught up in thinking negative. Thanks for the great tips!! <3

    1. I think we all can at times – unfortunately. Hope these tips are useful for you Lala 🙂

  14. I really love this post. It’s so insane that such small negative thoughts can add up to a huge pile of negativity in our lives. Great tips!

    1. Hi Shruti! So happy you like it. I agree – even if the negative thoughts are small, they certainly build up which isn’t good for any of us. Best to be aware of them and get rid of them 🙂

  15. Awesome advice Yolanda! It’s so important to learn how to love yourself. I have shared your article with several friends : )

    1. Hi Samara. Thanks so much for sharing 🙂 I agree – we focus so much on others in our life that we need to get back to ourselves.

  16. I really needed to read this. As much as I love carrying our child, I’m at the highest weight I’ve ever been, my skin is horrendous, and I just feel huge in everything I own. Negative thoughts are so hard to avoid but I need to start being easier on myself

    1. You certainly do need to start being easier on yourself. I know it can be so hard at times, but I truly think that if we are aware of negative thoughts – then we can start to focus on pushing them away. By the way = I think you look gorgeous pregnant and you will have a beautiful miracle upon you soon xo

  17. You totally nailed it. Especially in the blogging/social media/influencer world, we are constantly working and comparing ourselves to others. Then bring in motherhood, and it’s like a competition around every corner. How relateable and what inspirational words to help us realize that we are all special and have so much to offer this world. Thanks for this pick-me-up and inspiration!!

    1. Hi Rachel! I’m so happy this was a pick-me-up for you. I think we all struggle with comparison and when we really think about it – it’s silly as we are all in such different situations and stage in our lives and careers. Hope you have a lovely day!

  18. I so, so, so needed this especially with how life’s been lately. Negative thoughts and self-talk are so tough for me, as I’m a realist! I need to break those habits.

    1. Hey Summer! I’m so happy to hear that it was helpful. Life can definitely give us a lot of bumps in the road at times so I hear you – it can be so difficult. That’s why when we know life is challenging we need to be easier on ourselves. xoxo

  19. Stephanie says:

    Self love! Sounds so easy but yet its an every day battle against who sometimes could be your worst enemy, Your own MiND. It can be such a jerk! But great tips ! Thank you so much 🌻

    1. You nailed it Stephanie! Our minds can be jerks – that’s why we need to kick those negative thoughts to the curb!! xo

  20. You explained it very well! It’s so easy to compare ourselves to others. I need to practice that especially to be a good example for my kids.

  21. Great read. it’s so easy to get stuck in a pattern of negative self talk, you’re right – we shouldn’t be so hard on ourselves!

  22. So funny, I was just listening to a podcast on my drive today about this very same topic! It’s amazing how changing our mindset toward positive thinking can dramatically improve our life! I love it!

  23. I loved this!!! We as humans are so hard on ourselves especially we as women. I too hate bathing suit shopping because I don’t look like I used to. I remind myself that as you get older your body changes and that’s okay. It did give me the motivation though to get in better shape not just because I want to look good in a bathing suit again. The comparison game is so real! It’s hard to not compare yourself to others but it does more harm than anything. Great tips!!

  24. Great post! I struggle with comparison (to others and to my former self). It’s so silly, because it doesn’t help me or anyone else. When you mentioned comparing oneself to that blogger making loads of money in their first year blogging… that is so me! I really need to stop doing that so I can focus on my voice and share my story. Thank you for a great post. I’ll be pinning this!

  25. Self love always begins with thoughts that then can be turned into actions. I loved how you were able to turn all those negatives into positives.

    1. 100%! I think a big part of turning negative thoughts into positive is being mindful of the thoughts in the first place. It definitely can take some effort but so worth it.

    1. Absolutely. I think once we recognize that everyone has these thoughts, we can stop being so hard on ourselves.

    1. Thanks Susie. Glad it was helpful 🙂

  26. This was wonderful to read and like you were in my head reading my thoughts totally. We have all and most still do continue these thoughts. Good to have and know ways to nip it in the bud hopefully before it starts.

    1. Thanks so much Candy 🙂 Very true – I think we all have these thoughts now and again so as long as we recognize this, we can do something about it.

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