21 Alternative Questions To Ask Instead of “How Was Your Day?”

To show our interest in those we care about, many of us ask our loved ones ‘how was your day today’? 

Of course, depending on who you ask you’ll most likely get a one-word answer … fine (your kid), busy (your spouse).

Why? Because ‘how was your day’ is a close-ended question and will probably lead to a dead end in terms of your conversation.

So, to initiate more meaningful, deeper conversations and truly find out how someone is doing there are different questions you can ask instead of the generic ‘how was your day’.

Whether you’re talking to your best friend, family members, your younger children or teens, using open-ended questions is the best place to start.

Before we get into the different ways you can ask ‘how was your day’, let’s take a look at the benefits of using an open-ended conversation starter.

The Benefits of Going Beyond ‘How Was Your Day?’

• It’s easier to get a detailed answer instead of a vague response
• Create a healthy discussion around any issues your loved one is having
• Begin the habit of deeper conversations at the end of a long day
• Enable positive conversations around the dinner table or before bed
• Get to know the people you care about more – i.e. learn more about your kids school day
• Make your loved ones feel important and supported especially after a bad day
• Helps you practice being present with those you love.

21 Questions To Ask Instead of How Was Your Day

I’ve broken down the following questions into things you can ask your kids or partner, but honestly – you can also tailor these for anyone.

Questions To ask your children

Whether you have young children or teens these questions wil encourage conversation. Give one a try and see how it goes.

1. Who did you play with/hang out with at lunch time today?

2. What was your rose and thorn today? The idea is for them to communicate one thing that didn’t go well today (thorn) and at least 1-2 things that went really well (rose). This is perfect to do at bedtime or dinnertime.

3. How is your (enter fun activity here) going? This could be a video game, book, or anything your kid is passionate about. 

Example: How is your Pokémon game going?

4. How did your (enter project or class here) go today? For example:

• How did your science project go? 
• How did your gym class go today?

These are easy to follow up with additional questions… i.e. did you end up playing soccer? 

5. What’s the funniest thing that happened at school today? Getting your kids to share something that made them laugh is always encouraged.

6. What was the best part of your day today? This way your child can respond with literally anything – eating breakfast, leaving school, watching a funny video.

7. What’s the kindest thing you did today?

8. Would you do anything different next time? This can refer to a test, project, sports game and so much more.

9. What’s something new you learned today? You can also tailor this to a specific class.

10. What’s the tastiest thing you ate today?

Related: The Importance of Love & Affection Towards Your Children

Questions To Ask your partner

Understanding your partner’s experience, whether good or bad, can strengthen your bond and show your love and support.

11. Did you get a chance to deal with (enter challenge they’ve been dealing with)?

12. What are you most proud of today?

14. What did you enjoy most about today?

15. How was your call/appointment with ____?

16. What are you grateful for today?

17. How is (person’s name) doing? Asking about a friend or family member that is important to your partner is a great way to connect.

18. Did you get up to anything fun today?

19. What do you wish you did more of today?

20. Who made you smile today?

21. Is there anything I can help you with today? Especially helpful if you know your spouse is going through a tough time or is overwhelmed.

Tips for asking the right questions

• Always listen. The more you listen, the easier it is to strike up personal conversations about someone’s day.
• Tailor your questions to something someone is focused on that day/week.
• Show your interest to help open the conversation up even more. This means having eye contact and reinforcing the conversation with positive gestures.
• Ask a follow-up question, especially to those who don’t share a lot (i.e. your kids)

For more inspiration and to get the latest post from Put The Kettle On, let’s connect!

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