Wondering How to Ask for Assistance with All The Things?!
If you need to get help and find a better balance in your life I’m happy to report that this article from Jenn at Happy Healthy Impactful was written just for you. She’s a fellow blogger friend of mine who has offered some life-changing simple tips you can start to get the help you desperately need! Learn more about Jenn at the bottom of the post.
You know, that friend on Instagram? The one that seems to be able to do it all? She looks like she has it together, so we should be able to do it all too, right? Uh, wrong. At least my inevitable mental breakdowns tell me so.
Like many of us, I have a difficult time asking for help.
I don’t want to put anyone out because I feel it’s my responsibility to handle all the things. But doing it all is an unattainable goal.
Instead, we’re just overworked and overwhelmed.
There is, however, living a life of abundance, productivity, and peace. We don’t have to feel so exhausted all the time. It just takes a different way of thinking.
You see, the key to truly thriving is asking for help. Before that mental breakdown occurs.
This post contains affiliate links. Disclaimer here.Do you have difficulty asking for help? Read this! #worklifebalance #balance Click To Tweet
Why It’s Important to Be Bold, To Get The Help You Need!
Asking for help is how we put important priorities first, move forward in our lives, and take better care of ourselves. Whether it’s to learn new valuable skills or take mundane tasks off of our plates. Think of it as designing your life for the most growth and joy.
“You get from this life what you have the courage to ask for.” – Oprah Winfrey
Step #1: Understand your “why.”
What do you love to do?
What do you do that brings purpose or happiness?
And, what are you good at?
Step #2: Envision asking for help with something that is NOT in your “why.”
Maybe it’s laundry or something at work you hate doing.
How would you benefit from this small ask? Could you earn more money because you can devote more time to your skills? Better mental or physical health? A closer relationship with your kids?
Step #3: Imagine what you lose by not asking for help.
Count how many hours you do that task in a week and a month. What opportunities are lost because of this task? And, realize what you will look like down the road if you don’t get help.
Really see and feel these emotions. How much more happiness and balance would be in your life with a little help? And, how much more would you be able to accomplish towards what really matters to you?
Decide What Help You Need.
Now, what are all the things that don’t make the cut in your “why?”
Make your list! For now, just list anything that comes to mind! What could you delegate to improve your quality of life?
I love seeing specific examples, so here are some of the things I am always looking for help with:
- Cleaning (oh how I hate thee)
- Childcare (for work, relationships, health)
- Small work tasks
5 Helpful Tools To Start Getting help
Now, we need to figure out how we go from the list to real life! So, here are some different ways we can help make it a reality!
1. Find the right person for the job.
Most jobs require different people with different availability or skills. Perhaps someone you live with can help more with laundry and that friend you have with great computer skills can help with work tasks. Figure out who would be best for different things.
2. Just ask.
As my husband would say, “I can’t read your mind.” Most people are willing to help if you would just have the courage to ask.
Start small if this is something that is really hard for you. Like anything, practice will make this easier.
3. Schedule it in.
If I don’t put a date night or a block of work time in the calendar, I won’t get the childcare needed to make it happen. It’s as simple as that. If someone is going to help you a certain day of the week, make sure it’s marked down for both of you.
4. Delegate to family members you live with.
To all the moms out there, kids are capable of a lot more than we think. And, honestly, it’s such a valuable thing for them to understand a little bit of hard work. So, let the family be supportive and help more with household tasks! Create chore lists and clean up systems so that it’s a group affair.
5. Think strategically.
In some cases, can asking for help be a benefit to both of you?
Share a skill with someone in exchange for help in an area you struggle with. Or have them help with some meal prep that they can also take home for themselves.
Get creative in all areas! In many cases, a neighbor would love to be part of a carpool or babysitting swap, and that helps everyone out.So you need help? Ask for it! Here's how to make it happen AND see results! #balance #happiness #selfcare Click To Tweet
Asking for Help Examples
Now, knowing how to ask for help is half the battle. So here are a few tips to act in a way that’s going to get the response you desire.
Time it right.
Only ask for assistance when you’re calm. A last-minute request while you’re stressed out will mean that you are too emotional and won’t get the result you want.
Make it about you, not them.
If asking a loved one for help, make sure it’s not an accusation or demand. Make it an “I” statement. I feel ____ because____. Then open it up for discussion. This way they feel more in control and may be able to give further ideas on how to help.
Let them do it their way.
Many women struggle with letting go of control. Myself included. The person helping will not always do it the way you want it done. LET. IT. GO.
If you have to, leave the situation entirely. And, go into the request understanding that it will be done differently, or possibly not as well, and move on. Because, hey, at least it’s done!
Need Outside Help? Ask for It!
Sometimes, we need more help than what’s immediately around us.
There is no shame in paying for something that will free up your life in a way that makes you happy.
The most successful people in the world understand this and outsource. It’s often why they excel.
Save up to buy or hire.
Decide how much help you’d like and what your budget is. Not everything is a hefty monthly cost. Yes, a housecleaner will set you back a bit, but a robot vacuum is a smaller one-time purchase.
There are many different options that will fit different budgets.
Also, so many awesome opportunities exist online these days! I can order a meal service, practice my Spanish on Italki.com, or find freelancers for work on sites such as Fiverr. Many of these are cheaper than you think!
Check out your free options.
Where I live, we have pickup services through our major stores for free. I can order online and pick it up at my convenience. Any online ordering will deliver to your door and offer that same help. What options around you are available to customers?
If Help Is Not Available
Finally, there will probably be one or two tasks you can’t get help with due to circumstances or budget restrictions. In these cases, think of other ways to lighten the load. Maybe the task can be automated or eliminated instead!
- Make a template that you could use over and over?
- Create a system or make it work automatically?
- Not do it? What would be the worst-case scenario if it doesn’t get done at all?
Something To Think About
Your turn! Ask for help in order to thrive and create more balance in your life!
Take your list, and decide right now who the best people are to help.
How you will ask? Or decide if you need more outside help.
Then, use the free time you acquire to create a life you truly love.
What help will you be asking for today?
Let us know in the comments below 🙂
Jenn Kropf is a Kansas City native and mama of three. She writes at her blog Healthy Happy Impactful, a place that empowers and supports others in personal growth, health, and family. Jenn is passionate about discovering ways to push ourselves forward and to give our kids the fundamentals they need to live a full life. Connect with Jenn on Instagram and Facebook.
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